my space, our space and a place under the sun to find yourself and be yourself

Staking claim to territory/space or fighting for territory is prevalent among all creatures. As times change the game of ‘my space and our space’ is manifested in differnt ways,; in the office it is a cornor office or a larger cabin and while travelling it is a window seat or front row. At home , … Continue reading “my space, our space and a place under the sun to find yourself and be yourself”

Staking claim to territory/space or fighting for territory is prevalent among all creatures.

As times change the game of ‘my space and our space’ is manifested in differnt ways,; in the office it is a cornor office or a larger cabin and while travelling it is a window seat or front row. At home , it is not so obvious, but every one including the family pet, finds the most comfortable place for himself/or herself.

While the mundane aspect may be a matter of physical comfort, the more important factor would be the need for privacy, or the need for company. A four year old, may jockey for a place closer to his dad(or mum ).

A couple may look for a place to relax by themselves.

It is not that only the well to do people ‘find’ theirspace. Look at this villager comfortably perched on a roof top watching the sunset. He seems to be as much at ease, as a sophisticated lady in her drawing room.

It is always a balance between too much proximity which can be intrusive or too much distance leading to loneliness. At Ahmadnagar, during one of the many army courses I have been through, I made it a point to go for an early morning jog. At the end of the run I would stop to enjoy the sunrise. It was a kind of lonely place , a gently sloping ground, in the middle of nowhere. Everyday, without fail, en elderly couple would be sitting there well before the sunrise. They would sit about four feet apart , never closer nor farther. Since the place was desolate, there was no dearth for space. Probably, getting closer would crowd them and getting farther would be lack of company; In any case there was no verbal communication.

There is a requirement of someone near and dear within earshot distance yet non intrusive. To some extent this requirement is fulfilled by non stop FM radio or TV. An added advantage with this surrogate companion is that you can set the volume or turn it off when you want.

The comforting sound of pots and pans, or bangles accompanied by the aroma of cooking can actually be better than a non stop chat. This being the male perspective, I am sure ladies would find it good to have some signs of the presence of a man around; non intrusive I mean. Some music, a game on TV, ruffling of newspaper, cursing or even snoring. Of course, the signs of children in the house is generally distracting , but the absence of the mess they create may be disturbing or even depressing.

Why I don’t want to be a normal person ?

My daughter appeared for a music theory exam at bhopal. the music teacher had assured her that she would be helped, to which my daughter had shot back , “i don’t cheat” Eventually the exam was conducted on the terrace of a friend’s private house (music teacher’s freind) . most of the candidates were adults, … Continue reading “Why I don’t want to be a normal person ?”

My daughter appeared for a music theory exam at bhopal. the music teacher had assured her that she would be helped, to which my daughter had shot back , “i don’t cheat”

Eventually the exam was conducted on the terrace of a friend’s private house (music teacher’s freind) . most of the candidates were adults, who were not only copying from books but had also to be helped by the invigilators to do just that. my daughter kept watching the whole thing while she refused to be part of the cheating that was going on.

her music teacher saw her answer paper, and was surprised to find that many of the answers were correct. He was referring to a book and could find some answers incorrect and offered to help ,”just two lines….”. My daughter refused flatly. then came the gem,

” aapka mummy bahut strict hai, papa to normal hai na?”

when i heard that i actually felt so offended. what does it mean when an average indian today, specially on the northern side of the Vindhyas call you normal?

What is a ‘normal’ person expected to do in this time (kaliyug) and space (bharatvarsh) ?

At the workplace

– Do minimum work and get maximum pay, perks and privilages and ‘the other income’; hardwork even a donkey can do, we are human’s na ?

As a parent

– admit your child in the institution where you want him to be, after buying/making necessary certificates and negotiating the right price for the right service

As a student

– get maximum marks with minimum studies after all you are training yourself to do the same at the ‘workplace’

As a trader /businessman

– Obtain maximum returns for minimum services or goods, afterall you have to get rich quick to prove yourself.

As a taxpayer

– What tax and why ? just pay whatever it takes to avoid tax.

As a teacher

– Earn more from tutorials while conserving time and energy at regular teaching

As a doctor

– Expend your time and effort only on such treatment that maximizes the bill.

As a general citizen

– Spit in public places
– buy a platform ticket, parking ticket or traveling ticket only where absolutely necessary
– follow only such laws/rules where infringements are monitored and where the rates for bribe is higher than the cost of abiding the law.

…..and many more

under such circumstances, It would definitely be a compliment when you hear someone say “Oh, he is abnormal”

a perception : your problem and my problem

the other day my daughter was ticked off by her mother, for not taking off the shoes in the bed room; probably something that happens between all mothers and daughters. It went something like this:- mom : it is so irritating.. keeping your shoes on, in the bed.daughter : a ‘so what ?’ look …mom … Continue reading “a perception : your problem and my problem”

the other day my daughter was ticked off by her mother, for not taking off the shoes in the bed room; probably something that happens between all mothers and daughters. It went something like this:-

mom : it is so irritating.. keeping your shoes on, in the bed.
daughter : a ‘so what ?’ look …
mom : take them off.
daughter : no reaction

after sometime i suggested, “i am not getting irritated but it definitely is a bad habit”
promptly , my daughter took her shoes off.. to my wife’s surprise.

she later explained ” if mom got irritated it is her problem, but if i develop a bad habit, it is my problem”

a poem found floating by in the cyber space

yashodaragautama says 58 timesdetachment bringsdivinementnon expectation bringsdeliveranceafter deliverancewhat is there tocall life/////////////// death is welcome as long as life goes onbut when death comes wonder why struggleto beat it back as anyhow life hasbecome a living death Ahhh! dues to creditors of lifechild, mother, father , husband , son etc etc unpaidwant to rest restless … Continue reading “a poem found floating by in the cyber space”

yashodaragautama says 58 times
detachment brings
divinement
non expectation brings
deliverance
after deliverance
what is there to
call life///////////////

death is welcome as long as life goes on
but when death comes wonder why struggle
to beat it back as anyhow life has
become a living death

Ahhh! dues to creditors of life
child, mother, father , husband , son etc etc unpaid
want to rest restless mind, soul, body, eyes
but scared of the rest too
as still hoping to live a life which
not know how but?????????????

death is scary
life is wary
a third choice
wish i had

view from an old age home

everyone should stay in an old age home at least for a day, to observe and think. Impermanence of everything is so obvious; strength and beauty, health and confidence. All that is visible is disease, old age and death; dukha, the reality of life. What Siddhartha did not see in his time was the effect … Continue reading “view from an old age home”

everyone should stay in an old age home at least for a day, to observe and think. Impermanence of everything is so obvious; strength and beauty, health and confidence. All that is visible is disease, old age and death; dukha, the reality of life. What Siddhartha did not see in his time was the effect of money and the modern medicines. In the ancient times,even the kings had to be satisfied with herbs and blood sucking leeches for treatment.

Today, old age and death are fought by doctors. Doctors and modern medicines can prolong life in exchange for money and what is life in a city, without money ? a living death!after wealth goes, friends and relatives are the next to go, followed by dignity and self esteem, adding a whole new dimension to “sans everything” of Shakespeare. The subsequent rounds of treatments take a little more money and effort and give a little less lease of life and it goes on till the very end. There are times when one is forced to choose between quantity and quality; longevity vs quality of life.

train journey

train journey is a great time to read. take a thick book, heavier the contents better it would be; a book like “The tao of physics”. After every paragraph, look outside, at the scenic beauty and leisurely cudchew on the contents.

train journey is a great time to read. take a thick book, heavier the contents better it would be; a book like “The tao of physics”.
After every paragraph, look outside, at the scenic beauty and leisurely cudchew on the contents.

Hope and Despair

When you see a young child struggling up a stair you feel good,because you know the child is getting stronger and adventurous. When you see an old man struggling up a stair, you feel depressed, since you know that a man once fit taking two steps at a time, is now stuggling and will someday … Continue reading “Hope and Despair”

When you see a young child struggling up a stair you feel good,because you know the child is getting stronger and adventurous.

When you see an old man struggling up a stair, you feel depressed, since you know that a man once fit taking two steps at a time, is now stuggling and will someday give up the struggle.

There are no easy answers

There are no easy answers Today we have more choice than we can handleand there are no easy answers it starts from coffee or tea, indian, or south Indian (??),Chinese or Thai cuisine marriage or living infor short term or long term organization or freelance ..family or friends live in your home town ormake a … Continue reading “There are no easy answers”

There are no easy answers

Today we have more choice than we can handle
and there are no easy answers

it starts from coffee or tea, indian, or south Indian (??),
Chinese or Thai cuisine

marriage or living in
for short term or long term

organization or freelance ..
family or friends

live in your home town or
make a home where you make a living

what about children and parents ?
to what extent you live for them and what do you expect from them ?

what are your rights and responsibilities
to family, society, country and to yourself.

Adopt or follow an established religion, complete with its core beliefs and rituals
or customise one , blaze a new track ?

today, more than ever before, there are more questions than answers;
and there are no easy answers.

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Some Amazing Coincidences

Swami Vivekananda and Subramanya BharathiSome amazing coincidences Swami Vivekananda and Mahakavi Subramanya Bharathi are perhaps the greatest personalities in 18-19th century to have influenced the youth.Both died young at the age of 39 years. Both were philosophers with an aggressive patriotic fervor. Everyone knows that Sister Nivedita was the disciple of Swami Vivekananda but few … Continue reading “Some Amazing Coincidences”

Swami Vivekananda and Subramanya Bharathi
Some amazing coincidences

Swami Vivekananda and Mahakavi Subramanya Bharathi are perhaps the greatest personalities in 18-19th century to have influenced the youth.
Both died young at the age of 39 years. Both were philosophers with an aggressive patriotic fervor. Everyone knows that Sister Nivedita was the disciple of Swami Vivekananda but few are aware that bharathiyar himself was a disciple of Sister Nivedita. Sister Nivedita’s parents were active members of Irish Home Rule Movement and it was natural that she encouraged the freedom struggle in India.

9/11 , then and now

11 Sep 1897 Swami Vivekananda addressed the parliament of religions at Chicago,Hinduism shook US as only Hinduism can. 11 Sep 2001 Attack on WTC, Newyork, Islam shook US as only Islam can.

11 Sep 1897

Swami Vivekananda addressed the parliament of religions at Chicago,Hinduism shook US as only Hinduism can.

11 Sep 2001

Attack on WTC, Newyork, Islam shook US as only Islam can.