The Road Less Travelled :Where Science meets Mysticism

Dr Scott M Peck

When a scientist explores mysticism or when a Mystic contemplates a science laboratory, it produces astounding results. Though to a western trained mind it might sound rather strange , Science and Religion or Mysticism need not be mutually exclusive. After all where Physics ends where   Metaphysics starts and   Psychology and Parapsychology do overlap. So it is natural that many scientists stray into the zone of philosophy and vice versa. The fourteenth Dalailama is a passionate student of Science and Technology. He has initiated a number  of studies to explore Buddhist methods on training of mind through the prism of Science. Some of the other books where Science and Mysticism overlap are :

  •         The Tao of Physics by  Fritjof Capre
  •          Zen and the Art of Motorcycle maintenance by Robert Pirsig
  •          Altered Traits: Science Reveals How Meditation Changes Your Mind, Brain, and Body By Daniel Goleman

Pic Courtesy :Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance

These days, some of the top bestsellers are books on self-improvement. At some stage , everyone gets motivated to read books on self improvement and a good number of people do try and practice what these books advocate. Most of these books talk of positive thinking and positive attitude. It’s like a magic wand. Believe it can be done and it is done. Phew, easy does it. Anyone can. Be a winner. In this group what stands out is one book which started simply with a sentence  “Life is difficult” . It is a paragraph by itself. It is not a book that says think strong and you will be strong , think you are rich and wealth will follow. It is a kind of admission that life was indeed difficult and one had to face it. That was the first step to relief or Nirvana.

The New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth

The book is  “The Road Less Traveled by Dr Scott M Peck. When I started reading ,it proved to be an unputdownable book. Later , I learnt that, the first paragraph was taken from Buddhist philosophy , the first of the four noble truths ‘reality of suffering’”. You can find the influence of Zen Buddhism as well as ideas of Christian Philosophy through out this book and other books by the author.

Dr Peck was trained in Psychology and he did a stint with US Army for 9 years rising to the rank of a Lt Col. Later he practiced as a psychiatrist at Connecticut (USA).Though he was born in a protestant  family, he had a secular upbringing. Later, he developed interest in Zen Buddhism and Islamic Mysticism before he was drawn to Christianity. He was Baptized at the age of 43, in the year 1980. to hear it in his own words

……..Even though I was raised in an extremely secular home, as I look back on it, I was a freakishly religious kid, although not specifically Christian. And always I felt God to be in the background, always benign, never paid him or her that much attention, specifically, but felt him or her very much there. Christianity meant nothing to me as an adolescent, but in adolescence I fell in love with Eastern mystical writings, and then very gradually evolved from them to more attention to the Jewish and Muslim mystics, and then only finally to Jesus making more sense as I was moving toward writing The Road Less Traveled, when I was about 35 or so. I was a mystic first, and a Christian second. And I entered the Christian church through the back door of Christian mysticism, or maybe the top door, whichever way you want to look at it.

My baptism was in a number of ways a real kind of death for me, as it is supposed to be. And one of the reasons it was a death for me was that by declaring myself a Christian, I was declaring myself not to be Buddhist, not be Jewish, not be Hindu, not be Muslim, and as if I was casting disparagement upon traditions that had deeply nurtured me. So that was just one way in which my baptism represented a death in that I declared myself and regretfully in many ways. …..

Naturally , his first book was a on Psychology liberally  laced with the idea of faith, goodness, evil , God, religion and such terms not normally associated with Psychology as a Science. Random House, where the then little-known psychiatrist first tried to publish his original manuscript, turned him down, saying the final section was “too Christ-y.”

When finally published, it was was an instant hit. So what is this book about ?

The book consists of four parts. In the first part Peck examines the notion of discipline, which he considers essential for emotional, spiritual, and psychological health, and which he describes as “the means of spiritual evolution”. The elements of discipline that make for such health include the ability to delay gratification, accepting responsibility for oneself and one’s actions, a dedication to truth, and “balancing”. “Balancing” refers to the problem of reconciling multiple, complex, possibly conflicting factors that impact on an important decision—on one’s own behalf or on behalf of another. The discipline here is quite different from army discipline where it is all about appearance and obedience. To Dr Peck, Discipline is only about how you keep the promises you made to yourself.

In the second part, Dr Peck talks of ‘Love;. First he follows the Indian idea of ‘Neti Neti’(not this, not this) ; a process of examining various theories and eliminating them one by one in search of Truth. He eliminates certain popular conceptions of ‘what is love’ to label them as ‘romantic love’ , ‘dependency’ and so on. Then he tries to list down the  attributes of Love; devoting a chapter for each attribute , illustrating with case studies.

Dr Peck argues that “true” love is rather an action that one undertakes consciously in order to extend one’s ego boundaries by including others or humanity, and is therefore the spiritual nurturing—which can be directed toward oneself, as well as toward one’s beloved.

In the third part Peck deals with religion, and the commonly accepted views and misconceptions concerning religion. He recounts experiences from several patient case histories, and the evolution of the patients’ notion of God, religion, atheism—especially of their own “religiosity” or atheism—as their therapy with Peck progressed.

The fourth and final part concerns “grace“, the powerful force originating outside human consciousness that nurtures spiritual growth in human beings. In order to focus on the topic, he describes the miracles of health, the unconscious, and serendipity—phenomena which Peck says:

  •  nurture human life and spiritual growth,
  • are incompletely understood by scientific thinking,
  • are commonplace among humanity,
  • originate outside the conscious human will.

He concludes that “the miracles described indicate that our growth as human beings is being assisted by a force other than our conscious will”

Overall, the book gives no shortcuts to success. In fact  even the word ‘success’ is conspicuous by its absence.  What he aims at is to attain more efficiency, balance, better productivity, emotional stability , better inter personal relationships and spiritual development. If all these can be achieved, I suppose success as commonly understood should follow.

Posted in Books | 2 Comments

Reality Mining !

In this age of distraction, this book analyses how our behaviour, what we eat, how we dress, to whom we vote for and what we believe are constantly monitored and influenced by others, knowingly or unknowingly.

An interesting idea , that is also bewildering on the shape of things to come.

A team at Human Dynamics laboratory at MIT is working on  a concept called “reality mining”,in which they monitor people’s behaviours , body movements , conversational patterns and other inter actions using data from their mobile phones and specially designed electronic devices such as blue-tooth location sensors and accelerometers.

just like data-mining, where you go in and look at data and try and find patterns and make predictions and understand what’s going on , except instead of being applied to text and web pages and things that are already digital ,we are trying to find patterns in in real life . This way,you can tell a lot about people; where they go, who they hang out with , even whether they are having a good time.

The Power of OthersThe Power of Others by Michael Shaw Bond

An interesting book. We think we are in-charge of our lives not aware that  knowingly or unknowingly , to what extent our behaviour is influenced by people around. The author goes on to analyze , mob psychology, criminal psychology and issues like how a terrorist is born .

In this age of distraction , age of social media , the book is all the more relevant as our behaviour and thoughts are influenced by the real as well as the virtual world we interact with .

View all my reviews

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Thirukkural

 Thiruvalluvar Statue and the adjacent Vivekananda Rock Memorial at sunrise.

 Original uploader was Infocaster at en.wikipediaTransferred from en.wikipedia; transferred to Commons by User:BishkekRocks using CommonsHelper.
 



       I have always been fascinated by Thirukkuralfor it is sheer breath and depth. Every time you study the couplets you get a new insight into a whole range of subjects and issues. 
       Once, in a casual discussion with some of my North Indian friends I happened to mention the book . The topic of discussion was Indian contribution to Civilization. Just as I was preparing to build a case for arguing that this was the greatest contribution to the world by India, I noticed the blank faces and raised eyebrows all around. I kept going nonchalantly, till a guy blurted out ,“ Thirukkural ? What the hell is  it ?” Since then I generally kept my thoughts to myself on this great work, particularly when in the company of friends from north of the Vindhyas. 

       Of late I have noted some quotes and mis-quotes on the social media and for whatever reason people seem to be showing some interest in talking about it , if not studying it or following the teachings. So, I venture to write a brief note on what it is all about. It would be preposterous to say , it is a critique or a review of the work ,may be  just a glimpse of one view of a huge mountain as seen from a particular spot; just a primer for my North Indian friends


            Basically, it is composed of couplets like the dohas of Kabir das or Rahim. What is remarkable is that  these verses are so well organized to cover every aspect of human endeavour over centuries. It pans across time and space to continue to be as relevant today in this ‘Whatsapp Age’ as it was 2000 years before in an agrarian society. The book covers Ethics and value system in a society as much as an individual’s quest for fulfilment in terms of peace , prosperity fame and love.  If Valluvar’s advice to a king during war places him at par with SunTzu , his verses on ethics and love reminds you of Lao-Tzu and Vatsyayana. Unlike Vatsyayana who covers the physical aspects of Love  in detail, Valluvar focuses more on the psychological aspects.


            Keeping in line with the concept of Dharma (Duty or Righteousness), Artha (Wealth) and kama (Pleasure) , it is broadly divided into ‘arathuppal’, ‘porutpal’ and ‘Kaamathupal’ Then there are chapters under each part and each chapter is divided into sections . Each section has 10 verses . Thus the book of 1330 verses covers 133 sections. The importance  of an aspect to life  may be gauged by the number of verses on a particular aspect. For eg the importance of ‘company one keeps’ can be seen from the 50 verses under various heads viz 79 – 83.   The 133 subjects covered are tabulated below.   (Courtesy : http://www.gokulnath.com)


Tamil English Transliteration Kurals
1 கடவுள் வாழ்த்து The Praise of God Katavul Vaazhththu Kurals
2 வான்சிறப்பு The Blessing of Rain Vaansirappu Kurals
3 நீத்தார் பெருமை The Greatness of Ascetics Neeththaar Perumai Kurals
4 அறன் வலியுறுத்தல் Assertion of the Strength of Virtue Aran Valiyuruththal Kurals
5 இல்வாழ்க்கை Domestic Life Ilvaazhkkai Kurals
6 வாழ்க்கைத் துணைநலம் The Worth of a Wife Vaazhkkaith Thunainalam Kurals
7 மக்கட்பேறு The Wealth of Children Pudhalvaraip Perudhal Kurals
8 அன்புடைமை The Possession of Love Anputaimai Kurals
9 விருந்தோம்பல் Hospitality Virundhompal Kurals
10 இனியவை கூறல் The Utterance of Pleasant Words Iniyavaikooral Kurals
11 செய்ந்நன்றியறிதல் Gratitude Seynnandri Aridhal Kurals
12 நடுவு நிலைமை Impartiality Natuvu Nilaimai Kurals
13 அடக்கம் உடைமை The Possession of Self-restraint Atakkamutaimai Kurals
14 ஒழுக்கம் உடைமை The Possession of Decorum Ozhukkamutaimai Kurals
15 பிறனில் விழையாமை Not coveting another’s Wife Piranil Vizhaiyaamai Kurals
16 பொறையுடைமை The Possession of Patience, Forbearance Poraiyutaimai Kurals
17 அழுக்காறாமை Not Envying Azhukkaaraamai Kurals
18 வெஃகாமை Not Coveting Veqkaamai Kurals
19 புறங்கூறாமை Not Backbiting Purangooraamai Kurals
20 பயனில சொல்லாமை Against Vain Speaking Payanila Sollaamai Kurals
21 தீவினையச்சம் Dread of Evil Deeds Theevinaiyachcham Kurals
22 ஒப்புரவறிதல் Duty to Society Oppuravaridhal Kurals
23 ஈ.கை Giving Eekai Kurals
24 புகழ் Renown Pukazh Kurals
25 அருளுடைமை Compassion Arulutaimai Kurals
26 புலால் மறுத்தல் Abstinence from Flesh Pulaanmaruththal Kurals
27 தவம் Penance Thavam Kurals
28 கூடா ஒழுக்கம் Imposture Kootaavozhukkam Kurals
29 கள்ளாமை The Absence of Fraud Kallaamai Kurals
30 வாய்மை Veracity Vaaimai Kurals
31 வெகுளாமை Restraining Anger Vekulaamai Kurals
32 இன்னா செய்யாமை Not doing Evil Innaaseyyaamai Kurals
33 கொல்லாமை Not killing Kollaamai Kurals
34 நிலையாமை Instability Nilaiyaamai Kurals
35 துறவு Renunciation Thuravu Kurals
36 மெய்யுணர்தல் Truth-Conciousness Meyyunardhal Kurals
37 அவா அறுத்தல் Curbing of Desire Avaavaruththal Kurals
38 ஊழ் Fate Oozh Kurals
39 இறைமாட்சி The Greatness of a King Iraimaatchi Kurals
40 கல்வி Learning Kalvi Kurals
41 கல்லாமை Ignorance Kallaamai Kurals
42 கேள்வி Hearing Kelvi Kurals
43 அறிவுடைமை The Possession of Knowledge Arivutaimai Kurals
44 குற்றங்கடிதல் The Correction of Faults Kutrangatidhal Kurals
45 பெரியாரைத் துணைக்கோடல் Seeking the Aid of Great Men Periyaaraith Thunaikkotal Kurals
46 சிற்றினம் சேராமை Avoiding mean Associations Sitrinanjeraamai Kurals
47 தெரிந்து செயல்வகை Acting after due Consideration Therindhuseyalvakai Kurals
48 வலியறிதல் The Knowledge of Power Valiyaridhal Kurals
49 காலமறிதல் Knowing the fitting Time Kaalamaridhal Kurals
50 இடனறிதல் Knowing the Place Itanaridhal Kurals
51 தெரிந்து தெளிதல் Selection and Confidence Therindhudhelidhal Kurals
52 தெரிந்து வினையாடல் Selection and Employment Therindhuvinaiyaatal Kurals
53 சுற்றந் தழால் Cherishing Kinsmen Sutrandhazhaal Kurals
54 பொச்சாவாமை Unforgetfulness Pochchaavaamai Kurals
55 செங்கோன்மை The Right Sceptre Sengonmai Kurals
56 கொடுங்கோன்மை The Cruel Sceptre Kotungonmai Kurals
57 வெருவந்த செய்யாமை Absence of Terrorism Veruvandhaseyyaamai Kurals
58 கண்ணோட்டம் Benignity Kannottam Kurals
59 ஒற்றாடல் Detectives Otraatal Kurals
60 ஊக்கம் உடைமை Energy Ookkamutaimai Kurals
61 மடி இன்மை Unsluggishness Matiyinmai Kurals
62 ஆள்வினை உடைமை Manly Effort Aalvinaiyutaimai Kurals
63 இடுக்கண் அழியாமை Hopefulness in Trouble Itukkan Azhiyaamai Kurals
64 அமைச்சு The Office of Minister of state Amaichchu Kurals
65 சொல்வன்மை Power of Speech Solvanmai Kurals
66 வினைத் தூய்மை Purity in Action Vinaiththooimai Kurals
67 வினைத்திட்பம் Power in Action Vinaiththitpam Kurals
68 வினை செயல்வகை Modes of Action Vinaiseyalvakai Kurals
69 தூது The Envoy Thoodhu Kurals
70 மன்னரைச் சேர்ந்து ஒழுகல் Conduct in the Presence of the King Mannaraich Cherndhozhudhal Kurals
71 குறிப்பறிதல் The Knowledge of Indications Kuripparidhal Kurals
72 அவை அறிதல் The Knowledge of the Council Chamber Avaiyaridhal Kurals
73 அவை அஞ்சாமை Not to dread the Council Avaiyanjaamai Kurals
74 நாடு The Land Naatu Kurals
75 அரண் The Fortification Aran Kurals
76 பொருள் செயல்வகை Way of Accumulating Wealth Porulseyalvakai Kurals
77 படை மாட்சி The Excellence of an Army Pataimaatchi Kurals
78 படைச் செருக்கு Military Spirit Pataichcherukku Kurals
79 நட்பு Friendship Natpu Kurals
80 நட்பாராய்தல் Investigation in forming Friendships Natpaaraaidhal Kurals
81 பழைமை Familiarity Pazhaimai Kurals
82 தீ நட்பு Evil Friendship Thee Natpu Kurals
83 கூடா நட்பு Unreal Friendship Kootaanatpu Kurals
84 பேதைமை Folly Pedhaimai Kurals
85 புல்லறிவாண்மை Ignorance Pullarivaanmai Kurals
86 இகல் Hostility Ikal Kurals
87 பகை மாட்சி The Might of Hatred Pakaimaatchi Kurals
88 பகைத்திறம் தெரிதல் Knowing the Quality of Hate Pakaiththirandheridhal Kurals
89 உட்பகை Enmity within Utpakai Kurals
90 பெரியாரைப் பிழையாமை Not Offending the Great Periyaaraip Pizhaiyaamai Kurals
91 பெண்வழிச் சேறல் Being led by Women Penvazhichcheral Kurals
92 வரைவின் மகளிர் Wanton Women Varaivinmakalir Kurals
93 கள்ளுண்ணாமை Not Drinking Palm-Wine Kallunnaamai Kurals
94 சூது Gambling Soodhu Kurals
95 மருந்து Medicine Marundhu Kurals
96 குடிமை Nobility Kutimai Kurals
97 மானம் Honour Maanam Kurals
98 பெருமை Greatness Perumai Kurals
99 சான்றாண்மை Perfectness Saandraanmai Kurals
100 பண்புடைமை Courtesy Panputaimai Kurals
101 நன்றியில் செல்வம் Wealth without Benefaction Nandriyilselvam Kurals
102 நாணுடைமை Shame Naanutaimai Kurals
103 குடிசெயல் வகை The Way of Maintaining the Family Kutiseyalvakai Kurals
104 உழவு Farming Uzhavu Kurals
105 நல்குரவு Poverty Nalkuravu Kurals
106 இரவு Mendicancy Iravu Kurals
107 இரவச்சம் The Dread of Mendicancy Iravachcham Kurals
108 கயமை Baseness Kayamai Kurals
109 தகை அணங்குறுத்தல் The Pre-marital love Thakaiyananguruththal Kurals
110 குறிப்பறிதல் Recognition of the Signs Kuripparidhal Kurals
111 புணர்ச்சி மகிழ்தல் Rejoicing in the Embrace Punarchchimakizhdhal Kurals
112 நலம் புனைந்து உரைத்தல் The Praise of her Beauty Nalampunaindhuraiththal Kurals
113 காதற் சிறப்புரைத்தல் Declaration of Love’s special Excellence Kaadharsirappuraiththal Kurals
114 நாணுத் துறவுரைத்தல் The Abandonment of Reserve Naanuththuravuraiththal Kurals
115 அலர் அறிவுறுத்தல் The Announcement of the Rumour Alararivuruththal Kurals
116 பிரிவு ஆற்றாமை Separation unendurable Pirivaatraamai Kurals
117 படர்மெலிந் திரங்கல் Complainings Patarmelindhirangal Kurals
118 கண் விதுப்பழிதல் Eyes consumed with Grief Kanvidhuppazhidhal Kurals
119 பசப்புறு பருவரல் The Pallid Hue Pasapparuparuvaral Kurals
120 தனிப்படர் மிகுதி The Solitary Anguish Thanippatarmikudhi Kurals
121 நினைந்தவர் புலம்பல் Sad Memories Ninaindhavarpulampal Kurals
122 கனவுநிலை உரைத்தல் The Visions of the Night Kanavunilaiyuraiththal Kurals
123 பொழுதுகண்டு இரங்கல் Lamentations at Eventide Pozhudhukantirangal Kurals
124 உறுப்புநலன் அழிதல் Wasting Away Uruppunalanazhidhal Kurals
125 நெஞ்சொடு கிளத்தல் Soliloquy Nenjotukilaththal Kurals
126 நிறையழிதல் Reserve Overcome Niraiyazhidhal Kurals
127 அவர்வயின் விதும்பல் Mutual Desire Avarvayinvidhumpal Kurals
128 குறிப்பறிவுறுத்தல் The Reading of the Signs Kuripparivuruththal Kurals
129 புணர்ச்சி விதும்பல் Desire for Reunion Punarchchividhumpal Kurals
130 நெஞ்சொடு புலத்தல் Expostulation with Oneself Nenjotupulaththal Kurals
131 புலவி Pouting Pulavi Kurals
132 புலவி நுணுக்கம் Feigned Anger Pulavi Nunukkam Kurals
133 ஊடலுவகை The Pleasures of Temporary Variance Ootaluvakai Kurals

(Courtesy : http://www.gokulnath.com)

      It would neither  be feasible nor desirable to cover the whole book , but I would like to quote a few verses on different subjects, to give an idea of the clear, concise, and precise way the verses are composed, even while retaining the poetic form.I suppose a gentle warning is in order here .”the English translation can never capture the original meaning and form”

On Education




Explanation
Learning is the true imperishable riches; all other things are not riches

On Purity of Action 




Explanation
Though a person may see his mother starve; let him  not act in a way which the wise would treat with contempt.


the kural takes a clear unambiguous stand on the eternal debate between ‘means and ends’

On Friendship


Explanation
(True) friendship hastens to the rescue of the afflicted (as readily) as the hand of one whose garment is loosened (before an assembly)

this kural, defines what a friend means

On Children


Explanation
“The pipe is sweet, the lute is sweet,” say those who have not heard the prattle of their own children


the poet in Valluvar is at his best

On Social Gossip about young lovers (Page 3 ?!)


Explanation
This malady (of lust) is manured by the talk of women and watered by the (harsh) words of my mother


What an insight into the effect on young lovers on gossip by the society and admonition by parents.


      The reductionists that we are , the first challenge for anyone coming across a book today, is on how to classify it. (A trivia on Shiva Triology by Amish Tripati; the publishing was delayed since the the publishers couldn’t agree on whether the book would be classified under non-fiction,  fiction, religion, mythology or anything else.)


     Is Thirukkural , a religious book ? Well, many atheists love it. Is it for ‘self Improvement’ ? May be, but there are many verses on ‘vegetarianism’ , ‘non violence’ , ‘refraining from alcohol’ which may not gel with a mind influenced by the western way of thinking. There is advice on virtues,vices, health, wealth , governance , diplomacy and everything under the sun, which cannot be classified  under any school of thinking. 


        One may not agree with every verse nor is there a need to. It has something for everyone. Every individual is inspired by a different verse, at different point of time in his life. There is something in it for every one , any time. Take what appeals to you , leave out what doesn’t , but make sure you revisit  the verses at a later stage in life. Whatever be,  learning and dwelling on just 10 – 20 of your favourite verses from the 1330 verses can definitely enrich one’s life to a great extent.     

Posted in Books | Leave a comment

Moga Mul (மோக முள் )

      Saw the movie mogamul   . Sure it is slow moving , but makes you think at  every twist and turn. The song ‘sollayo vai thiranthu just about sums up the main theme . Archana Joglekar looks beautiful and the mother daughter duo live their roles as  tamil-thanjavoor marathi caught in a cleft.
      
       If a movie can be so  touching, the book has to be more so. Whoever said, ‘a picture is worth a thousand words’ ? after all a picture also has to give rise to words, or can we think or appreciate a picture without words, with just visuals; may be the youngsters these days can.  Words let you imagine a picture, may be a different picture every time you read the words or reflect on the words, depending on the mood , and your own stage of growth. This is one book of Thi jaanakiraman I had not read. Thanks to flip cart, it is so easy to procure tamil books, even from a town like Mhow.

        I took a week to finish the 600 odd pages. In fact , I deliberately read slowly, so that it can be savored for a longer time. A book has to be ‘put downable’ so as to let you chew the cud leisurely, relishing  and reflecting on  every chapter. Each character has been portrayed so live, complete with warts and all. It is total Thanjavoor and Kaveri; a place I have never been to , yet I feel so much part of. In fact my thanjavoor is as seen through Thi jaa’s books and of course from my father. Some of the words and phrases you come across in the book are no more in vogue. After a long time I came across ‘haithari kodagal’ an exclamation that I have heard only from my father.

        Kaveri and Carnatic music  gently flow all along the story. There is that subtle humour, characteristic of the region. One can sense the spiritualism, talent  and  brilliance in individuals and also the appalling cruelty in some of the social customs and  practices.

       A young girl is married to an old man; then there is the character ‘thaiyyu paati’ who steps off the road, every time someone approaches to avoid bringing bad luck to people. She was married at three, widowed at four and for the next seventy years she has lived like this. This one sentence brings to mind a thousand pictures of cruelty to women in this society.

      Predictably, the book is better than the movie. While there is lot of romanticism in the movie, the book is more realistic, may be a little pedestrian, which is what real life is.

 
      Another book that can be read more than once.

      

Posted in Books | 1 Comment

For God’s Sake

       A book by an adman, alumnus of IIT and IIM; one more IIT guy excelling  in fields other than engineering.

      It is not about how God influences your life , but about how the idea of God affects business in India.

     Written in a lively , chatty, yet informative style, as a series of somewhat disconnected essays, it makes a nice office hours reading ! It is particularly good for random access reading, if I may call it so, jumping from chapter to chapter not in any particular order, switching gears as you go. A casual skimming over the table of contents  took me to  the chapter ‘burkha ke peeche kya hai ?’ ; the answer is not what I thought or what you are thinking nor ‘dil’ as in ‘choli ke peechhe kya hai  ‘but ‘designer-ware clothes‘. It is a phenomenon that has led to hundreds  of garment factories in a country populated by millions of burkha clad women. 
     Then there are essays on divine arts, divine tourism, sacred music all contributing to the way Indians of all religious hues think, earn and live.
     If the western idea of secularism keeps  religions insulated from politics, business, education and just about everything, Indian idea of secularism is so inclusive that it demands some measure of every religion in every aspect of life !
Posted in Books | Leave a comment

lean in

The last blog post I did on the subject was ‘When work doesn’t work any more ‘ . WOMEN, WORK AND IDENTITY and Sheryl Sandberg’s  ‘Lean In ‘ bears a similar subtitle with a major shift in goal., WOMEN, WORK AND THE WILL TO LEAD.

Lean in ‘; What does it mean ? Is it one of those untranslatable American slangs ? (Unfortunately none of Cambridge, Oxford, and Merriam Webster Dictionary includes “lean in” as an idiom.) But going through the net, there appears to be vast differences in what even Americans understand by that term. Reading and re-reading the book doesn’t throw much light as there seems to be an effort to keep the meaning vague, elastic and inclusive so as not to upset any section of the society.

Now consider a ‘leaner ‘ as described by the author …My mother has leaned in her entire life. She raised her children, helped her parents spend their final years in dignity and comfort, and continues to be a dedicated and loving wife, mother, and grandmother. She has always contributed to her community and the world. She is my inspiration……..
So, the term can be used in an elastic mode. It can mean anything from grabbing an opportunity, staying focused on a career and reaching the top posts with out holding back for any reason, internal or external. It can also mean ‘just being assertive and boldly expressing the needs and wants of women individually and collectively”. by the way, why do Americans always ‘grab’ ‘stuff’ ? Grab a coke, grab a plate etc, why can’t they just take a drink or pick up a plate ?

Well, I am digressing, coming back to ‘leaning in’ ; from the book it appears to have two essential ingredients viz, sitting at the table and keeping the foot on the gas (reminds me of the motto of Sikh Battalion “Jo hoga so hoga ,Dabbi chal” – come what may, bash on regardless-) . And all this requires making your partner a real partner!

Here we go.

The first part is applicable for anyone, man or woman who wants to go up in his/her career. grab opportunities, sit at the table, raise your hand, don’t mute your achievements, negotiate well for your compensation (ask for more and get it) and so on. There are any number of men who are shy or self-effacing as there are pushy women. If you want to stick to stereotypes  well , anybody in India should be able to compare Tamilians and Punjabis, to get an idea.

The second part , don’t leave till you leave.. focuses on the unavoidable obstacle in the career path (ladder or jungle gym) . People talk of women’s liberation , first wave, second wave etc…. . It is child birth that confined women to home rather than men or a patriarchal system and it is the pill which liberated them from multiple / unwanted pregnancies. Pregnancy meant the end of economic independence, and the pill meant ‘freedom to choose your own path’ .With almost 100% fertility control, women were able to postpone having children or space births to pursue a career or a degree that had never been possible prior to the Pill.

Despite all modern medicines and equipment, there is still the issue of ‘period of confinement’, however short, that is sought to be addressed through ‘leaning in’. That is where the institutions need to change the work culture to suit moms and expectant moms and of course, the work place needs to be considerate to dads and expectant dads as well. Here again it is not men or the patriarchal society that has evolved the current work culture, but capitalism and corporate values .

Be that as it may, neither sitting on the table nor stepping on the gas will be possible without the right partner at home as the author points out. Making  your partner a real partner can be broken down into identifying a partner , and settling down to a working arrangement.

Sendberg’s advice on looking for a partner, ………….. When looking for a life partner, my advice to women is date all of them: the bad boys, the cool boys, the commitment-phobic boys, the crazy boys. But do not marry them. The things that make the bad boys sexy do not make them good husbands. When it comes time to settle down, find someone who wants an equal partner. Someone who thinks women should be smart, opinionated, and ambitious. Someone who values fairness and expects or, even better, wants to do his share in the home. These men exist and, trust me, over time, nothing is sexier. …….

The operative phrase is “Someone who wants to do his share in the home” And what does a woman offer ? ..”to be smart, opinionated and ambitious and of course an equal partner, whatever it means ” Does it just mean equal share of house hold chores, or does it mean equally share paying of the bills, financial management, maintenance of car / gadgets etc equal time and energy spent on family…. ? It is easier to understand equal partner in a commercial venture; ie equal ownership and equal rights in decision making; but equal partners at home ?! Sounds vague. May be it could be equal respect and dignity . 
On the lighter side, in a culture where dating is rare or non-existent , I can visualize the matrimonial advertisements !

There is an anecdote on how to test a date. After finding the right guy, then you train him, to suit your requirement, …..Even after finding the right guy—or gal—no one comes fully formed. ………If you want a fifty-fifty partnership, establish that pattern at the outset. (What kind of user manual is this ? Why stop at 50-50 and not go for a guy who would do 80 or 100 % of the work at home ? What if you want a 25-75 partnership or 75-25 partnership,or may be 25-75 in one aspect and 20-80 in another aspect, and different ratios at different stage of life ?)


After trying, testing, and clinching the deal, still things can go wrong. The author sums up the issue of women having both a career and family in the words of Nora Ephron of the famous “When Harry met Sally” , “It will be a little messy, but embrace the mess. It will be complicated, but rejoice in the complications. It will not be anything like what you think it will be like, but surprises are good for you. And don’t be frightened: you can always change your mind. I know: I’ve had four careers and three husbands.” 
 The purpose of the book is a clarion call to the women to lean in and attain half the top positions in every field and change the world from top. More than the book itself, it is thought-provoking to read articles/blogs and comments  on the net from working moms, stay at home moms, feminists and so on.

New terminologies learnt

  • Traditional marriage(Only man works outide), Neo traditional marriage(man does full time job and woman part-time job) and Modern marriage (Both work outside)
  • Jungle Gym Career Path
  • Stay at Home Mom (not home maker or stay at home wife)
  • Benevolent sexists or nice guy misogynists
  • Maternal gate-keeping (mother in law like supervision on household chores)
  • Intensive Mothering (Done by stay at home moms to justify their title, shall we call it smothering ?) 



Posted in Books, Life,Society, Culture,Media | 3 Comments

A View from the Outside

Recently read a book “A View from the Outside” by P Chidhambaram. It is a compilation of articles written by the current Finance minister, in the period from 2002-2004, when he was out of power and in political wilderness. He was not even in the Congress Party, but in a kind of splinter to a splinter party of Congress. Fresh from his stint as the union finance minister and with plenty of time on his hands and with no compulsion to stick to a party line, he has expressed himself freely on a range of political and economical issues. He has unambiguously expressed his views on monetary policy, black money, inflation, trade policy, FDI issue, Support to farmers, election reforms, and so on. It is creditable that till date he has not had reasons to regret for expressing any such view which would embarrass him or his party which is now in power.

On the issues of political parties diametrically changing their views on critical issues,P Chidhambaram had once remarked, “Where you stand (on various issues) , depends on where you sit”. For once , as a leader of a one man party (congress jananayaka peravai , much like Subramnyam Swami’s one man party) he could take any stance on any issue, any time. There are many controversial ideas like he argues then , as he argues now that colour of money does not matter. The Nation needs money for infrastructure, so let the black money rotting in swiss banks (or now in Indian private banks) come out in the open
Most of the articles are critical not only of the then NDA Govt , but also of earlier govts on various aspects of commission or omission on economic policies. His view on politicians and corruption in the political system is strikingly similar to those of Anna Hazare and Arvind khejrwal. It is ironical that he was in the receiving end in 2011, during the so called August kranti.

View from outside is always interesting on any issue. Retired cricketers look so much more relaxed and so  enthusiastic when commenting on the game now than in their playing days.

Life itself is more interesting when viewed as an outsider, with ‘Sakshi Bhava’ (as a witness), or udasin Bhava (detached state) as a Hindu philosopher would call it; may be that is why it is easy to find solutions for most difficult problems concerning others while a trivial issue concerning oneself gives such sleepless nights.
Posted in Books | 1 Comment

Listening to Grasshoppers

Read a collection of essays by Arundhati Roy Titled “Listening to Grasshoppers– Field Notes on Democracy”

Arundhati Roy must be one of the most hated figures in India, as she spares nobody, be it the govt, the judiciary or the celebrities. Always ready to court controversy, she  manages to be politically incorrect ,so consistently.  She is against free market, against US brand of democracy; and she speaks for naxals, for Afsal Guru and Geelani, people considered the enemies of the state.  She doesn’t get much support from the media as well. Arnab Goswamy, in one of the debates on “Kashmir issue”, fired an unprovoked salvo, “Arundahthi Roy and Bharat Bhushan ! are you listening ? we have not invited you to our studio, because we find you disgusting.” Ironically, the very people she is fighting for, the farmers, dalits, down trodden, adivasis, Naxals etc would  be hardly aware of her, and even  if they do their voices are seldom heard.

It is extremely difficult to hear any views from an Indian on our own national media, speaking up  openly in favour of Kasmiri separatists or the naxals. It is easier to view / read news of ‘patriotic indians kicking and punching any compatriot indulging in such open criticism.

There is indeed a very thin line between suppression of criticism and tolerence of sedition , in a democracy.
This title of the book is drawn from an essay, “listening to grasshoppers” , a lecture delivered by the author in Istanbul, on the 1915 genocide of Armenians in which more than one million people were killed. the lecture, the author says, was about the history of genocide and genocide deial and the old organic relationship between ‘progress’ and ‘genocide’
While nobody says genocide is right, there is little critcism of ‘acceptable genocides’ for eg, the great genocide, in which the europeans exterminated 50-60 million native americans or australian aborigins, all in the name of development and progress. Whereever there is a western model ‘development’ there are victims whose cries go unheard. While holocost of jews is much talked about, there is hardly any awareness of other groups like gypsies and homosexuals, systematically annihilated by the Nazis during the period of  ‘nation building’ in Germany, even prior to WW II. The great powers of the time were just looking on the legitimate aspirations of the German people.

Martin Niemöller was a German Pastor who became controversial by openly supporting Hitler’s policies in the early stages of the Third Reich.He later expressed his misgivings about some of Hitler’s acts,for which he was jailed and narrowly escaped being sentenced to death.After the war, he became active as a pacifist

First they came for the communists, and I did not speak out – because I was not a communist;
Then they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out – because I was not a socialist;
Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out – because I was not a trade unionist;
Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out – because I was not a Jew;
Then they came for me – and there was no one left to speak out for me. 

Genocide does not necessaily mean killing people; it may be achieved by systematically creating an environment for an entire people to gradually fade away. Our rural popuaion is slowly getting choked as all resources from the rural areas are appropriated by the Rich, with full support of the police and judiciary and millions of people are forced to move to the urban slums where they have few rights even to food and water leave alone the democratic rights to voice their opinion. 
The essays are published unedited, as written at various points of time; after the attack on Indian Parliament, after Gujrat riots, during the peak of uprising in Kashmir and after 26/11. 

Mostly it is an expression of  raw anger against all kinds of injustice ; for  some satire,  here’s a link to a street play performed by students protesting against George Bush’s visit to India in 2006.

However, bitter the ideas are, there is definitely an element of truth and it calls for a lot of soul searching on the part of every policy maker and opinion maker in the country.    

Posted in Books | 1 Comment

Mammaries of the welfare state

Reading  ‘English August’ and ‘Mammaries of the Welfare State’ by Upamanyu Chattterjee, prompted me to pen my own experiences with babus of the Welfare State . Most people include army in the ‘babus’ category, but, despite being a govt organization it is more like a corporate, in terms of order, work culture, efficiency and accountability; in short, it is more like HDFC bank than SBI.
So when we do get to work in a civil govt org, we too undergo a cultural shock. I have had to deal with three different State Govts, while serving with NCC (National Cadet Corps) , viz, Tamilnadu
(TN), Madhya Pradesh (MP) and West Bengal (WB). There are vast  differences betwen the States in  language , resources, and work culture. In most of the states, NCC comes under the Education Department or the Department of youth affairs, but in WB, it comes under the Department of Civil defence and Disaster Management (CD and DM), though NCC has little do with Civil defence or disaster management except in extreme circumstances.

Be that as it may, considering that everyone is interested in milking the welfare state, it is a common factor that in any State you approach the dept, mostly for finances. Milking the state is a full time job, and it can lead to ludicrous situations. In WB, there was an NCC BN, where not a single clerk was posted out of authorized strength of 10. Of course there were 12-15 Group D staff posted. The question is how do you do the paper work for drawing the salary and other allowances . A clerk was hired to do the needful and he was paid out of the unit’s private resources. So the only work done in the unit was preparation of salary bills and that too was outsourced !

While at TN and MP, I was just one of the users, in WB, I was one of the privileged few to be involved in budgeting, release of funds and such aspects.
This took me to the famed Writers’ Building atleast twice a week. The WB Govt , or the Party, as they call it, loved to exercise tight control over everything and what better way to achieve this  than by holding on tightly to the purse strings.
An NCC unit incurring an expenditure of say, Rs 2000/- for sending just one cadet for some training, had to send  a proposal to the Department through the proper channel of communication. This was finally approved by the Dept of CD and DM, and  a Goverment Order (GO) was issued based on which the amount was drawn from the Govt Treasury. 
Issuance of a GO is a torturous process, requiring the concurrence of the triumvirate, Pricipal Secretary (PS), Joint Secreatry (JS) and Deputy Secreatry (DS) , duly approved by the all powerful “finance dept” and the invisible hand of the trade union. Despite all efforts,  the funds may not be available in time if the particulr clerk responsible for  typing the GO glares at you and says ‘hobe na’ (not possible) for whatever reason. It may be due to the fast approaching Durga Poojo (Poojo starts approaching  a month in advance) or ‘jomoi shashti’ or one of the many ‘poojos’ in the land of ‘barah mahino, teroh poojo’. When poojos didn’t oblige, the didi did by calling for a bandh on the odd working day. Those were the days when didi was in the opposition.
Coming to the ring side view of the working of the Govt, the minister was young, highly educated and a genial man. But any interation with him started and ended with exchange of pleasantaries. The PS, of the IAS cadre, was again a very affable person, but had definitely imbibed the work cuture of the State, with the long years spent in the districts. When he was not pan-chewing in a comtemplative mood, or discussing office politics, he could be seen laboriously working on a draft letter with one bare foot perched on the chair, and tongue sticking out in deep concentration. The entire process of issue of a letter, from dictaion to his PA, typing, corrections, recorrections, retyping and final despatch could take about a week in good times.ie when there was no disruptions due to strikes or poojos. A computer was seen in his office, but it was seldom used.
The real work or obstruction to any kind of work took place in the large halls, populated by hundreds of clerks, duly supervised by JS s and DSs from their tiny cabins. One had to negotiate through a labyrinth of corridors, with only the singara vendors and huge stacks of files and the public toilets, for sign posts. You literally had to use your nose for navigation.
It all may sound very depressing, but surprisingly things do move, if you keep at it. People are good natured and courteous even if they didn’t like being rushed in their workplace. Only in their workplace they take it easy; they are just personifications of efficiency when it comes to participating in Durga poojo celebrations or while organizing a musical night. The PA to the minister was secretary of his mohalla Durga poojo cmmittee and by the way he plotted and planned to mobile resources for the poojo, one would think that was his primary job. So, things did move if you are patient.

West Bengal Civil Defence Minister Sreekumar Mukherjee



It was a great day, when I saw the ‘Master GO‘ declaring that the senior most army officer responsible for all NCC activities in the state , was empowered to draw and expend money, based on a lump sum allotment for the whole year. It also meant the end of my biweekly or triweekly visits to the Writers’  Building. Fortunately for me, my tenure there alo came to an end around that time, for I would definitely have missed the trips through the corridors of power. 
Posted in Books | 2 Comments

A Married Woman : Manju Kapur

After her debut novel, Difficult  Daughters, Manju Kapur has followed it up with ‘ A married woman’, another story highlighting the struggle within a seemingly conventional woman to find her identity in the family and the society. ‘A married woman ‘ starts in the period 70s and 80s, the period, when the ‘difficult daughter’   signed off.

If the first novel was about education vs marriage, the second is about a woman’s right to own property, manage finances, develop her talents, explore her passions, thrive for self actualization and all this from within the safety and security of a rock solid marriage.

The story starts with, Astha, a middle class college student,  running away from ‘girl seeing ceremonies’ and the constant talk of her marriage at home. She has a couple of teenage flings before finally getting married to a ‘good boy’ as arranged by the parents.

While the husband has relatively liberal views on women, he continues to take his role as the ‘sole provider’ too seriously. I suppose, this is one role men have to go easy on and women have to be a little more serious about to bring about harmony at home.

As the story unfolds, there is a nice description of the fears and aspirations of a middle class family , in the 80s. Astha’s parents, pay the price for not preparing well for the retirement, while Hemant’s parents ride the boom in demand for property.  

After a few months of married life, ‘dullness’ sets in. With, undemanding in-laws and  ample support from domestic help, she has enough free time to be restless. She has to take up a job. It had to be a teaching job, which she dreaded.

In-laws approved ” It is a good time-pass”
Mother: ” As a teacher you will earn some money, you will be out only half a day, so the house will not suffer”

father: “It will do until you decide to develop yourself in other ways”
Husband :- With a job you won’t get fidgety if I am a minute late”

So, a career is made, for all these reasons, while Hemant’s business picks up well to provide for the family.  Kids come, grow old enough to go to school, depending less and less on their mother. Obviously it is not a life fulfilling enough for Astha.

Astha’s latent talents surface, encouraged by the attractive Street Play director , Aijaj. She starts painting. Babri masjid issue comes up , conveniently enough, so that Astha can express her social awareness and responsibilities with her painting talents.

Enters Pipleeka  Khan, to arouse in her a kind of sensuality, which she did not know that it existed.

Now you have a married woman donning many hats and switching deftly among the many roles that she plays; as wife , daughter in law, mother, an artist  a social activist and  a passionate lover to her lesbian partner. So much for self-actualization.

Naturally, it is not easy to play so many conflicting roles. She resorts to lies and deceit which is sort of justified , for whatever reason.

“She began to lie at home about where she was going and what she was doing. Most of the girls she knew who were seeing boys lied. It was routine self protective thing . And how necessary, Astha had seen.”

“Her lies grew skillful. Her desperation and her need had ensured that they tripped off her tongue, as though she had rehearsed them for hours.”

Much has been said about the rendition of a lesbian relationship. Frankly it is not easy to understand.   

“…….Afterwards, Astha felt strange, making love to a woman took getting used to. And it felt strange, making love to a friend, instead of an adversary.”


Strange it is ! to call men as adversaries, and if so, it is stranger to call ‘having sex’ as ‘making love’.

A good read, if only to learn or understand  a little more about the women in your lives.






























Posted in Books | Leave a comment